*This is an email that went out to my list for Mother's Day 2018, a special and sad day for me all at the same time! This email got a ton of responses, even some reply's and 2 text messages from past clients that they loved the topic! Everything is not always roses and butterflies, life can have it's challenges, but it is how we handle those challenges that makes us stronger, and I am a firm believer that having the tools to do that makes all the difference!! It's why I do what I do, and help people heal the way I do.
Even if you are not a mom you can relate to this story! A really shitty mother's day in 2007, three years before in 2004, my mother had passed away, suddenly! I had just had a miscarriage, after trying to conceive for 2.5 years! Spending thousands every month at the fertility doctor didn't help either! A new baby niece was just born, that wasn't planned! I wasn't a mom and I didn't have one.........OMG let the pitty party begin! It was horrible, and ugly crying, stay in bed kinda day, the lowest I had ever felt in my life! But wait .........positive ending. I am a mom! I have awesome female figures to mentor me, and a really close friend who is like a big sister!!! How did I get to the positive space ......... Some of you will have a beautiful memory and positive feeling when you hear the word “mother” and others will be reminded of painful times. This is a great opportunity to take inventory of what happens in your body, heart, mind, and spirit when you are asked to remember your mother. When I released expectations of my mother, I set myself free of my own wanting what I didn't have. My thought process around my mother became softer and more forgiving as I allowed her to be who she was. I began to observe what my mother was skillful at and what she wasn’t very good at. I stopped judging her for the things she wasn’t good at and loved her just the way she was. She was strong and funny and helped me be independent and resilient. Plus she looked awesome in a bikini at 45, when I was 15 I didn't appreciate that, but now I can see how the time she took to take care of herself (and not eat enough) More on that another time!! As I have become more mentally and emotionally resilient, my immune system has also, I no longer have autoimmune disease the way I did years ago, freeing myself from my own expectations of how life was supposed to go, enabled me to heal emotionally and physically! Because I am big on the how do I do that part........here is a tool for releasing resentment and giving appreciation for the good....... There is an ancient ritual from the world of Ayurveda. It’s called Tarpana. In this ceremony, you bring an image up of each of your ancestors, including your mother. You observe them closely and then thank them with profound appreciation for what you have inherited from them, including the skills they taught you for communication, handling stress, support, your birth, a roof over your head, etc. You then let go that which you do not wish to continue forward in yourself or your children. You end with deep gratitude for the gift of life that your mother gave you. No matter what, she deserves appreciation for incubating you and birthing you into this marvelous world. You can then take inventory of what your children might be doing Tarpana around regarding you…and change anything you think they might want to get rid of.
Have the Happiest of Mother's Days
PS. If you feel like you are dealing with a wound from your relationship with your mother, this article by Dr. Ashlee Greer explains the Mother Wound,
Read it HERE.
The book The Emotionally Absent Mother: How to Recognize and Heal the Invisible Effects of Childhood Emotional Neglect, has been life changing for so many! Take a look at the description on Amazon.
Are you ready to use humor and compassion to bravely guide self-healing, self-awareness and self-care to empower women to heal autoimmune diseases, chronic pain, fatigue and negative thinking? Much Love Suzanne
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